Narcissists and superficial relationships

Narcissists choose 'crush' based on the fact that they increase their self-esteem. As this need is continuous, they don't have much incentive to hope to get to know a person better with whom they initiate contact and commonly set out for wedding plans. What attracts narcissists the most aren't lasting personal qualities. As long as the person has an elevated status in its eyes (in the case that the 'cerebral' narcissist is supposed to be a 'genius', for example) and believes that the person is incredibly supreme, then with all these qualities the narcissist is usually willing to go ahead with the sudden 'relationship' in full swing, even if it's with a stranger who makes mysterious calls📱. Its real interest is fanciful and idealized.

 

What narcissistic and borderline have in common making them prone to choosing each other: both quickly form intense 'romantic' connections based on very little information and knowledge about the other person. Idealizing that the stranger is the 'greatest' genius in the world 'and a' copy 'of yours, would be enough for the 'cerebral' narcissist, for example. Most people who aren't Borderline or Narcissist tend to take a long time to decide if the new crush is "the one". Borderlines and narcissists fall in love and relate instantly when they barely know each other, often believing in the 'soulmate' myth. 

In bordelines and narcissistic individuals, at first, everything can seem very happy because both share the ability to make romantic connections very quickly, artificially and apparently 'intense', without looking too closely at the other person's real personality. For these people, the 'personality' of a person is simply to be what they appear, what they sell, what they fantasize and idealize. Each sees the other as a great dream come true. They live on fantasies, idealizations and ghosts.

Narcissists continually seek the perfect match. Perfect like them. An unreal and idealized love that no one else can give. Perhaps that explains why everything seems so perfect when starting a relationship, even on the📱 with someone like that. As this ideal person (in the narcissistic parameters) doesn't exist and over time the idealized person with personal contact becomes increasingly accessible and real, the narcissist seeks satisfaction in primary sources of narcissistic supply such as status (the 'cerebral' narcissist would be supposed 'superior genius'), high positions, awards, flattery.

In the narcissistic man, his frequent 'Peter Pan Complex' and in some cases Oedipus Complex seeks a maternal figure who cares his life, even if he is a complete stranger on the📞 who seems 'genius', in the 'cerebral' narcissist case. Thus, people, whose vital energy nourishes them, are secondary sources of narcissistic supply. Having someone, is to be flaunted by beauty or genius, to leave them with a good social impression.

The narcissist and the borderline, if they don't seek psychological support, aren't healthy and happy options for long-term relationships, as the initial phase of perfection and idealization will end and will be a lot of emotional and mental wear for those who relate with these manipulative, toxic and self-centered people. When realizing these typical behaviors, the best thing to do is to encourage psychotherapy.